The Consequence of Judgement

Sunday, July 27, 2014


The Consequence of Judgement
You don’t have the right to judge someone until you’ve lived in their skin.

I finished my novel this week.

This is actually a pretty huge deal for me. I haven’t finished a novel since high school. And by finished I mean, finish writing. Start to finish. There’s still a ton of editing I’ll have to get through before it’s anywhere near being finished enough for anyone else to read (except me, of course).

I don’t even know what I’m going to call it yet, but this is what it’s about:

It follows the life stories of two young women in their twenties who have never met before, are complete opposites in every way, and would probably never want to speak to each other if given the opportunity, beginning when one of the women wakes up in the other woman’s body and has no idea how it happened. While finding the answers, she’s able to find herself. In more ways than one.

She also realizes that her complete opposite, the woman she would judge without ever getting to know (if she hadn’t woken up in her body, of course), has more in common with her than she would have ever thought. 

The moral of the story, of course, is that we shouldn’t judge someone until we’ve lived in their skin. Nobody is perfect. Everyone has their own stories to tell. Everyone has scars.

But too often we judge before we’ve even had the chance to get to know the person we’re judging. We judge the clothes they wear, the way they speak, the amount of their education. We judge their past, present, and future. 

And by judging, we’re only hurting ourselves.

What if we didn’t judge? What if we stopped comparing their lives to our own, to how we think their lives should be? What if we got to know them instead? What if we accepted them for exactly who they are, right here, right now?

How many more friends would we make? How much more would we see our relationships deepen? How much more happiness would we gain by expanding our understanding?

More than we could ever imagine.

Stop judging, and start listening.


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